Have you ever thought that the world was actually full of robots? Did you think that you were the only real human and the rest of the world was “in on it?” If you’ve ever thought this same thought than you’re not alone. I’m also a real human and you should find me because all of these robots are really getting on my nerves. Sometimes I think that these robots get programmed every night, with information on how to ruin my life on a daily basis.
As a child I saw a movie where this boy’s parents killed their co-workers, ground their meat up into sausage and fed it to the boy as his dinner. Once the boy found this out he desperately tried to stop his parents but his father, Randy Quade, had become obsessed with human flesh and then decided to kill the boy. I lost a little respect for my dad after seeing that movie, mainly because he would make these hot dogs with German sausage that absolutely hated, and force me to finish my entire plate. I always thought it was human flesh and felt horrible after every meal containing sausage.
I’m part of the calculator generation, forced into a life of computers at a young age and video games. It’s hard trying to remember all these passwords, I could have it worse off though, I could be part of the manual labor and cigarettes’ generation. I played Sonic the Hedge Hog on my Sega video console as a child, let me just say, this was no good for me. My perception of reality was completely off track when I was younger and playing video games didn’t help matters. Every time I was in the back seat of our beat up station wagon, I imagined I was running at the same speed of the car I was traveling in, hopping off of things just like Sonic would do. I’d imagine sometimes that the car had left me behind and I’d have to “wind up,” imagining that I was tucked inside a small ball, spinning like a wind up toy car, then I would magically shoot off with the speed of like and catch up to the car.
I constantly forget things. I can’t hear and I buy in bulk. Sometimes I think I’m either a crack head or an old person. Same difference really. I've never really been a drug user. It's not for me, I've always been high on my own, I don't need drugs to make me more interesting. I'm an old soul, I'm still a gentelman on some occations and I always wish things were as simple as when we didn't have the internet. I also own multiple amounts of deodorant at any given time and enjoy movies with Racheal McAdams. That's why I'm old. Listerine also reminds me of old people.
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